Sometimes in our pursuit of self-improvement, creating boundaries, and reducing emotional distress, we tend to forget that messiness is also a part of life. We forget that making mistakes, confusion, resorting to unhealthy coping mechanisms, and moments of self-neglect are also important experiences that we need to grow. They are the reminders that there are still areas that you need tending to. They tell you that a scared child or angry teenager still needs your listening ear and gentleness. They tell you to contact a professional to teach better-coping mechanisms. Furthermore, you may find yourself continuously running into the same moments because you’ve never learned these lessons, found the answer, or recognized your patterns.
So, when you close the door at these moments, become extremely rigid, and cautious, you lose the spice of life. You forget about the journey, which is growth. You forget how to deal with these complicated emotions and that’s a shame because they teach you so much. They teach you empathy because you can relate to the confusion that others may feel about themselves. They teach you patience because it takes time to work through complicated feelings and you can extend that patience to yourself and others. They teach you how to have a more loving and accepting relationship with yourself because if you aren’t afraid to have a relationship with the “mess,” then you aren’t afraid to embrace all of yourself. Isn’t you having the best relationship with yourself what you want? But how can you do that when you don’t allow room for it? So, take this moment to allow that messiness to breathe and remember that it serves a purpose.