Male attention is a driving factor that has caused women to betray their friends, family, and co-workers. We’ve even seen it go so far as to compel people to commit homicide because they were obsessed with men. So, to stop things from ever going that far, let’s use some reframing that can help you see what you are doing when you seek male attention, and hopefully, it will get you to stop.
Realize your parents are wrong.
Mom and Dad were raised in an era where women did not have bank accounts. Mom and Dad were raised in an era where women had to depend on men for survival. Mom and Dad romanticize horrible relationships because they simply last long. Mom and Dad were raised under extreme patriarchal views and have not updated their perspective to match the world we live in now. So, Mom and Dad may be wrong, outdated, and not aware that women do not need men to survive and as a result, they don’t need to do things to appease men.
Know that you take power out of your hands when you seek validation.
Validation is something that comes from within you. If you decide today that you are worthy, then that's the end of it. Nothing can stop you except yourself. When you seek validation from others, you are giving away your power to decide for yourself. You create obstacles for yourself even though there are none. If you already have the power to validate yourself and you give it away, then you are allowing yourself to be your enemy.
Remember the more you feed into it, the more you cultivate an addiction.
Validation gives you get a boost of dopamine creating a motivation and reward relationship. So, seeking out men will become the motivation and validation becomes the reward. When you work in that framework, it doesn’t matter who the man is as long as he rewards you with validation. And when you live in that structure you will find yourself in some horrible situations all because you want the reward of being called pretty.